Family
"How good and pleasant it is when God's people live together in unity.
– Psalm 133:1
Our family recently gathered at Lake Martin to celebrate our youngest daughter, Bella's, graduation from Auburn University and her upcoming marriage later this year. It was a special and emotional weekend as we celebrated another meaningful family milestone together. Sitting around the table watching our children, grandchildren, and family laugh, share toasts, tell stories, and enjoy one another reminded me once again of the incredible blessing of family. See family pics from the weekend in the link.
At the same time, family relationships can be among the most challenging parts of our lives. Every family has wounds, struggles, disappointments, and areas where healing is still needed. Our family is no exception. Over the past 35 years, Amy and I have walked in and persevered through many challenges and seasons that stretched us deeply. Yet through it all, we have experienced the faithfulness of God bringing healing, restoration, perspective, and growth over time. We are still on the journey, still learning, still growing, and still trusting the Lord to continue His great work in our family.
One thing I know for certain: healthy families do not happen by accident. They require hard work in intentionality, humility, forgiveness, grace, and most importantly, the presence of God.
Key Principles of Healthy Family Relationships:
Healthy Families Begin with Abiding in Christ: The health of our families will rarely exceed the spiritual health of the individuals within them. If we are disconnected from God, insecure in our identity, or carrying unresolved wounds, those things will eventually impact the people closest to us. The good news is that Jesus invites us into healing and transformation. As we abide in Him daily, He gives us the grace, wisdom, patience, and love needed to navigate family relationships well. I am convinced that true peace and harmony in a family can only come through the power of the Holy Spirit working in each of us. "Bear with each other and forgive one another… Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Colossians 3:13. As leaders within our homes, we set the tone. It is surely not easy, but when we pursue humility, repentance, forgiveness, and growth, it creates space for healing and restoration to begin flowing through the family.
Divine Order Creates Stability and Blessing: God is a God of order, and healthy relationships flourish when our priorities are aligned properly. Disorder often creates confusion, tension, and dysfunction within families. Over the years, I have learned how important it is to continually realign our priorities: God first, healthy stewardship of ourselves, prioritizing our marriage, loving and leading our children well, and honoring extended family relationships with healthy boundaries and grace. This sounds simple, but it takes constant intentionality — especially during different life transitions. One of the greatest lessons I continue learning is that we cannot pour from an empty cup. If we are spiritually depleted, emotionally unhealthy, or disconnected from our spouse, those things eventually affect the entire family system. "Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33. When we put God first, and our relationships are prioritized in healthy order, it creates greater peace, security, and stability within the family.
Strong Families Are Built Through Grace, Communication, and Commitment: No family is perfect. Every family has blind spots, past wounds, misunderstandings, and seasons of conflict. The key is not perfection — it is perseverance, humility, and a willingness to keep showing up for one another. One thing Amy and I continue learning is the importance of creating safe environments for honest communication, healing conversations, and growth. Sometimes this requires outside wisdom from counselors, pastors, mentors, or trusted advisors who can help bring perspective and healing where needed. Healthy families extend grace generously, resolve conflict rather than avoid it, make time together a priority, celebrate victories and milestones, protect unity, and continue choosing to love even when it is difficult. "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." Ephesians 4:2-3.
Family is one of God's greatest gifts and one of His primary tools for shaping us into who He has called us to be. It is in the context of our closest relationships that our character is most tested, our faith is most stretched, and our need for God is most evident. The journey toward healthy family relationships is not a destination we arrive at — it is a daily choice to abide in Christ, extend grace, pursue healing, and love one another well. I am deeply grateful for what God has done and continues to do in our family, and I am convinced that His best work is still ahead for each of our families as we trust Him with the process.
Challenge Question: What is one relationship within your family that God is inviting you to lean into more intentionally this season — whether through a conversation, an act of forgiveness, or simply investing more consistent time and presence? What is one step you can take this week?
Prayer: Father, thank You for the gift of family. We acknowledge that we are imperfect people in need of Your grace, wisdom, and healing in our most important relationships. Where there are wounds, bring healing. Where there is distance, restore connection. Where there is conflict, bring peace and resolution. Give us humility to own our part, courage to have the hard conversations, and grace to extend forgiveness freely as You have forgiven us. May our families reflect Your love and become a legacy of faith for generations to come. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Family is one of God's greatest assignments for us — let's approach and pursue our family relationships with intentionality and faith. Have a blessed week!
